After an embarrassing loss at home in Week 6 to the Jacksonville Jaguars and getting their asses handed to them again on Thursday Night Football by the Green Bay Packers, it’s easy to see the Chicago Bears are such a disgustingly bad football team and it pains me to say that.
Thankfully, for this year’s Bears, their foul stench has been covered up by the historic run that the Cubs have been on. Because of the success in Wrigleyville, fans across Chicago haven’t paid much attention to what’s going on the lake front, but sooner or later baseball will end and a World Series hangover will pass and sports fans around here will wake up to find that they’ve been sleeping on the pissy mattress that is the Chicago Bears.
So for Week 7, I had dig down deep to find a suitable song to describe the mess the Bears are in. Behold – Vats of Urine by DangerDoom (Danger Mouse and MF Doom).
You can’t piss in a bottle of champagne and then try to pass it off like it’s some high quality ish, that won’t even pass in a pennant celebration. Still, that is exactly what the Bears have done by passing off this roster. No one expected the Bears to be Super Bowl contenders coming into the fall, but damn, they can’t manage to be a little bit competitive.
With all the losing, especially at home, the Bears have become a piss poor product that is not worth the time and investment of its wide and well-established fan base. Season ticket holders and diehard fans are starting to realize that their drinks taste funny and want someone to blame for this foul mess and are starting to question when whether general manager Ryan Pace or coach John Fox have what it takes to turn this thing around.
We know and understand success doesn’t happen overnight, but we’d still like some sense that the sun will rejoin us again in the morning.
Bears 2016 Playlist
Week 1 – Action Bronson, “Actin’ Crazy”
Week 2 – Wu-Tang Clan, “Bring Da Ruckus”
Week 3 – The Internet, “Just Sayin’/I Tried”
Week 4 – TLC, “No Scrubs”
Week 5 – Wu-Tang Clan, “Da Mystery of Chessboxin’”
Week 6 – Frank Ocean, “Nikes”
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