2013 NFL Draft Aftermath: Boring Bears (or, the Mutha f—– saga continues)

By Kyle Means, Regal Radio

I tried… I really did. But I got nothin.

Thus the problem when you follow a team like the Chicago Bears in the NFL Draft. In the draft, year after year, the Bears tend to either do something to completely demoralize or mystify you as a hopeful fan or they do something to just bore you.

This year they did some weird, mystical combination of the three by picking up the OTHER progeny of Howie Long, this not long after learning through another great installment of ESPN’s 30-for-30 series, “Elway to Marino” that the Bears had Papa Howie dead to rights in a potential trade with Oakland that Pete Rozelle cock-blocked, another hot mess resulting from the never-ending battle between Rozelle and Al Davis.

Only the Bears could cosmically be denied a future hall-of-famer in one generation, only to thirst over his drunk-driving, wanna-be baseball playing son a generation later. And reach over maybe a round or two for him. And he only started 15 times in college….smh.

Meanwhile, division rivals in Minnesota and Green Bay took headlines throughout the first two days (or better known as the picks that count) of the draft with slick trades and inspired offensive picks instead of reaches. All that took me out the whole draft, and Nate didn’t help, nor did Jason Collins’ peekaboo to the sports world when it came time to digest this whole thing Monday morning.

Naw, aint really much to shake ya dreds to in regards to the Bears haul, though they seemingly did make good use of their later picks value-wise, but in reality all this getting turnt up for watching just removed college kids in minicamp only makes sense if your team was god-awful last year.

The Bears, as usual, were frustrating last year but not that bad. The kids are alright — most of them have a chance to play a lot next year and do so for a team that expects to compete for something greater than the 20th pick in the 2014 first round, more like the 32nd pick — oh, how the Bears could fail to spark the imagination with that one… Anyway, here’s a few words on each of this year’s picks from people who think of the draft much more deeply than I do:

2013 Bears draft picks

1st round: Kyle Long, OL, Oregon

“As with Shea McClellin at No. 19 last season, Emery went not just for an immediate starter – Long is expected to move in as the starting left guard sooner rather than later – but also versatility.” — John Mullin, CSN Chicago

2nd round: Jonathon Bostic, ILB, Florida

“Bostic isn’t a great athlete and this pick is definitely a reach (which makes two reaches in two picks for the Bears).  While Bostic is a strong and physical player who attacks the play and will make big-time hits, he is not a top athlete.” — Russ Lande, National Football Post

4th round: Khaseem Greene, OLB, Rutgers

“Greene has the talent and production to have been a much higher selection. He’s not big, but Greene’s playmaking skills should translate immediately, allowing the Bears to add an impact rookie to a defense that will be adjusting to life without Brian Urlacher.” — Paul Imig, Fox Sports Wisconsin

5th round: Jordan Mills, OT, Louisiana Tech

“For a player his size, he appears to be quite nimble sliding and adjusting to movement. He is quick to seal and does a good job of getting to the second level to make contact.” — Adam Oestmann, ChicagoNow

6th round: Cornelius Washington, DE, Georgia

“At the beginning of his career, Washington will see the majority of his playing time on special teams. His speed gives him the ability to quickly get down the field on coverage teams. He also flashed the ability to get a push on the pocket and block kicks.” — Jon Dove, Bleacher Report

7th round: Marquees Wilson, WR, Washington State

“At 6-2, 194 pounds, he has a big frame and was very productive for the Cougars with 189 receptions for 3,207 yards (17 yards per catch) and 23 touchdowns in only 33 college games. But he needs to get stronger and has struggled with drops at times.” — Brad Biggs, Chicago Tribune

Wilson also hated his college coach, Mike Leach, and Leach likely hated him, but you know what… I’m not gonna hold that against him.

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